As allmost all of people need rests on the weekend, I need relaxing time to be alone.
I am in one of these moods- active or quiet. In the former mood, I am in high spirits and love the stimulates from anything. Spring terms are when I can feel it the most.
On the contrary, I cannot do anything in the quiet mood. It requires enormous energy to care about anything aroung me, even to reply an email or do the tasks. I have been suffered by it often in Autumn terms. This is one of the excuse I 'm absent from classes often. Sorry Marc.
I'm sure I am not good at self management, or controlling myself. However, it is needed to keep in high at least having the any kind of meeting with people. I hope I can be in active mood anytime because I believe it is the best condition of me, but once I got advice that I am unstable and make people around me worry in both of those mood. Thus now I'm wondering how I can behave for me and for the others.
Why don't I have the neutral mood? I suppose it is because I work and try to make it perfect by it reaches the limit, and then stop till the energy's recovered. Particularlyin this year, I am tend to fall into this loop.
I have been told that I always try to deal the problems on my own, including the works I don't have to do. I felt it is easy to solve them by myself than leave them to the others and wait for its finish. I have experienced the disappearence of a chief in my society who had amount of work, with no reason to give it up from the person, so I and one of the other member dealt it. Later I heard the excuse at ameeting with the person, but it was so hard for me as I give one month in summer vacation up for it.
I am unfortunately uncapable for being good leader, no, even a member now, although I am holding a lot of tasks I have never had. I will challenge to be better person to do my tasks and help the others, plus reduce the times I stop and make people around me worry as possible.
take it easy. set yourself free.
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